I’ve always finished everything I’ve started, no matter what. That includes marathons I probably had no business finishing, pushing through injuries and all.
But 29029 was the first time I had to stop.
Oddly, I was okay with having to stop.
That was the lesson the mountain taught me.
As long as you train, prepare, and put in the work, and if you leave it all out on the mountain - and I truly mean leave it all - then it’s okay.
Because when you fail, it means you put yourself in a position to try to do something that was a stretch.
And that’s where growth happens.
I had grown from that event.
I had learned acceptance.
I was strangely at peace with everything.
But, sitting on my back deck a few days after the event, looking out at the Park City mountains, something else hit me, and it hit me hard.
I need closure.
Sure, it was okay to fail, but I could still do my 13th ascent.
So I decided I’d go back.
Not for the event that had long since ended, but for myself.
A month later, I returned with a few close friends and my dog, Pelli.
We hiked that familiar trail, and I climbed that mountain one more time.
That was my 13th ascent.
It wasn’t the way I wanted it to happen.
It wasn’t the way I expected things to go.
It didn’t come with cowbells or finish lines.
But it was mine.
I did it.
29,029 feet.
Not the finish I imagined, but exactly the finish I needed.
I hadn’t failed.
I had learned.
And I’d grown stronger because of it.
I grew stronger from 29029.